Shades of Regret

Shades of Regret

When you are a mother of two small children, you spend a lot of time in public restrooms. It was my fourth trip to a public restroom in the last two hours, and I didn’t want to make another trip once our movie started.While waiting on my daughter to come out of the stall, an older woman was washing her hands and offered,

I just watched 50 Shades of Grey. I didn’t’ need that. My curiosity got the better of me.

She shakes her head and wrings her hands with soap. I nod and wonder what on earth I can tell this woman. What hope should I offer in a few seconds in the bathroom? It seemed she simply wanted to confess to me. She continued as I listened and nodded,

You know the man is just messed up.  Save your eight dollars and go get Chinese instead.

She shook her head, flung up her hand, and walked out the door while I meagerly offered a few remarks. This woman was clearly disturbed by the sadomasochistic movie that is sweeping the nation and was first within the grasp of teens, moms, and people of all ages at major chains such as Walmart, Target, and all bookstores and e-readers since 2011. It is reported to have sold 100 million copies in 52 languages worldwide.

An estimated 900 teens in Orlando (see here) stormed a movie theater in attempts to watch the rated R movie earlier this week.

The Christian community has not remained silent on this topic. Consider Dannah Gresh’s book, Pulling Back the Shades. (Read about it here.) Or, this thought provoking article by Dr. Russell Moore, Women Stop Submitting to Men? (click here). However, in the case that you have missed these, I want to warn you: flee the temptation to see what all the hype is about!

Men and women of the Church, do not use this as an opportunity to research pop culture. Consider this a call to be in the world and not of it. Protect your minds and relationships from this obvious working of evil. Many times we can fall into a spiritual pit of despair and sin we were not seeking, but consider this your warning that the pit is within your vision and the choice to descend is up to you.

Sex is so perverted in our fallen state post garden– post forbidden fruit. The good gift that God created from the time He introduced Adam and Eve has been polluted by the sins of this world. We worship the created act of sex above the Creator and pervert the original gift of sex within marriage. 50 Shades of Grey is another proof of this fact.

Don’t let curiosity rob you of your peace of mind and spirit. Heed the lesson from the woman I met, and warn your friends likewise.

Fight the good fight of faith and finish the race having won the battle over curiosities that God’s Word blatantly speaks over as evil and destructive.

Did I miss an opportunity to share Christ with this woman? Perhaps. I pray that she will seek out, or already knows the truth for herself. However, I didn’t miss an opportunity to pray for her. Further, I don’t think that it was any accident that I was in the right place at the right time to hear her confession and tell her story to you.  I can see her distraught look even now. I pray that the shades of regret will not be mirrored on your face.

Choose life.

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Purity and Social Media… Not Mutually Exclusive

CG Ladies

My husband and I were hanging out in the living room, he watching sports on TV as I scanned my iPhone Instagram App. Wading through pictures of friend’s children and the latest meme, I was jolted by the next photo that flashed on my screen. A former student from our ministry days was posed in her bathing suit bottoms, showing off her hard earned assets… I think you get the picture.

I stammered over my thoughts as I turned to my husband, Ron, and said, “It is really disheartening when I see former students who profess faith in Christ showing off their bodies and bad decisions on social media.” Without showing him the picture, I described the image. Without responding, Ron continued to fiddle with his iPad and watch the game. No reply from him led me to assume he has heard my modesty rant mortification spiel one too many times. However, imagine my surprise when Ron’s Facebook status popped up on my feed, seconds later.

“I am going to go out on a limb here and ask you girls who are working out like fiends and look great to protect us guys who are trying to be faithful to our spouses. Please save those photos for your husband either now or one day. #thinkbeforeyoupost Thanks!”

Read the rest over at iBelieve. (Click here.)

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A Day Remembered

Cooney-0071

Saturday marked Ron’s and my 11th wedding anniversary. I would love for you to take this day to visit his blog, Raise the Risk, and read the beginning of our story. Blessed to be loved by such a godly man and wonderful daddy. Click here to read his post, The Big Ask.

*Photo by Corey Conroy Photography

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Adorning the Bride

 adorning the bride

I will greatly rejoice in the LORD; my soul shall exult in my God, for he has clothed me with the garments of salvation; he has covered me with the robe of righteousness…as a bride adorns herself with her jewels. (Isaiah 61:10, ESV)

I struggle with my flesh and anxiety on the topic of dressing with modesty. This isn’t an everyday/ every-time-I-get-dressed struggle; however, I am a person who has a very sensitive conscience. Therefore, what I consider immodest the next woman might feel the freedom to dress in and vice versa: I may dress in something another women would not feel the freedom to wear. Even so, there are questions we can ask ourselves, as the Bride of Christ, and some tips to remember to help our men in the area of lust while we women purse purity in modesty of dress. 

  1. Will this cause a man to stumble or my sister to grumble that I have worn this in her man’s presence?
  2. Have I kept my cleavage in its context? That is, am I covering my cleavage in public and revealing it in the master suite?
  3. Are only two cheeks visible and lifted in a smile? Or,are four revealed when I bend over?
  4. Are my clothes as tight as a wet suit and I look better prepared to plunge into the ocean with an oxygen tank than to go out for dinner? Or, have I left room to breath?
  5. What is the status of my heart’s intent? Am I dressing to purposely turn the heads of men or a certain man, or am I presenting myself in such a way that communicates I care about my appearance?

Purity is ultimately a matter of the heart, mind, and inner man. God’s word provides the ultimate answers for the questions we face weather in specific guidelines or generalities. Concerning the topic of purity, I return to Psalm 119 again and again.

How can a young man keep his way pure? By guarding it according to your word. with my whole heart I seek you; let me not wander from your commandments! I have stored up your word in my heart, that I might not sin against you. Blessed are you, O LORD; teach me your statues!

I will meditate on your precepts and fix my eyes on your ways. I will delight in your statues; I will not forget your word. (Psalm 119:9-12, 15-16, ESV)

A few weeks ago, I had the opportunity of speaking with the women of our church on the topics of envy, jealousy, and modesty. The forum came half-way through our pastor’s wonderful sermon series entitled, Pure: Discover the Pathway to Intimacy. (If you attend Calvary with me and missed either the men’s or women’s forum there are CDs available at the Welcome Desk that you can purchase for both.)

Last night on Pinterest I found several other posts and videos on the topic of modesty to share.

First, this post by Courtney at Women Living Well. I highly recommend this read. I especially enjoyed the portion in which she compares godly, beautiful women of the Bible to the description of the Proverbs 31 woman. The comments are additionally worth skimming.

Second, this video was helpful to consider our men’s point of view on the clothes we wear and how this affects our relationships with men.

So now it is your turn:

Women, consider: How do you determine what is appropriate or inappropriate for your apparel? 

Men, what is your reaction to the viewpoint presented in the video above?

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