God bless you and the lives of the youth that you influence! For His Kingdom’s glory!
The How and Why of Blogging
12 Mar
“Human creativity is derivative and reflective, working within the bounds of what God has formed,” writes Os Guinness. As. C.S. Lewis put it, “an author should never conceive of himself as bringing into existence beauty or wisdom which did not exist before, but simply and solely as trying to embody in terms of his own art some reflection of that eternal Beauty and Wisdom.” Because of the Fall, we do not have a clear glimpse of Beauty or Wisdom; we see only a poor reflection. But because of Christ’s redemption, the arts can be restored. (How Now Shall We Live, Charles Colson and Nancy Pearcey, 1999)
I have not always considered myself an artist, nor, for that matter, a writer.
In 2008, I began a family blog to chronicle the life of our first child, Emily, in such a way that relatives in neighboring states could observe her growth and development. That blog consisted primarily of captioned pictures and a smidgen of video clips. Later, in August of 2010, I began writing a ministry blog: Raise the Risk. Fairly quickly I came to love the art and craft of writing. I began reading other more popular bloggers and learned more about this creative outlet I am called to.
In 2011, I decided that writing two blogs was too much. I wanted to graft my family blog and ministry blog together. I also wanted the freedom to write about all aspects of my life; not only the ones that involved everyday risks. As a result of that decision, This Temporary Home was born. I now consider this blogging home a place where I can capture the days and express my thoughts through the lens of a Christian worldview. It is my way of embracing everyday beauty.
Interested in starting a blog of your own? There is no one way, however, I would love for you to learn from my past experiences in blogging and shorten your learning curve a bit.
- I suggest starting with your own website versus a Blogger or WordPress blog. I have used all three and would forgo the headache of transitioning from one to a dot com. To do this you need to purchase a domain name and secure a server. BlueHost is the server that I use. A detailed description of how to go about this can be found here on Amy Lynn Andrews’ helpful website for all things technical on blogging. As you decide on your domain name (web address) the easiest thing to do is use your name as a dot com. For example: www.brookecooney.com. I did not choose this for various reasons, however, in retrospect this may have been a better option. Using your name gives you the flexibility of changing your blog’s name without purchasing another domain.
- Next, begin writing. Once you establish a regular writing schedule, you will discover the theme connecting your posts together. You may begin a food blog only to discover you continuously write about the guests you have over for dinner! Once you develop your writing style, and the theme woven into it, then you can begin working on your branding. More about that next. The most important element of writing a blog is consistency in posting. The more you write, the better you will become.
- Branding. By this I am referring to the web design and overarching message of your posts. These YouTube vlogs may be helpful in pursuing this idea further. I hired someone to design the look of my blog. I have no regrets for doing so. For a very reasonable cost, and much less anxiety on my part, a beautiful space was created for me to call my writing home. I would suggest that you look at your favorite blogs and websites and determine what exactly draws you to the look of those blogs. The look draws you, but the content is what makes people return again and again.
- Next, once you have blogged for a year, I would highly recommend converting your blog into a book. The company that I use each year is the Cutest Blog on the Block. These books are our family’s “scrap book” and also make for great gifts!
- One last piece of advice. When writing your blog and pursuing a reader base, always write with your audience in mind. In other words, try to tie in how the lessons you learn can impact your readers lives.
If you sense the Holy Spirit calling you to pursue blogging, be it writing, photography, cooking, or a creative how-to website, then I hope that the above suggestions will be of benefit to you. May you blog for His glory and for beauty!
*Photography by Ron.
A Birth Remembered
8 Feb
As we reflect on the five years lived with our Emily, we are overwhelmed with blessings. Emily, you have grown into a beautiful little girl full of love for others, a nurturing spirit, thoughtful ways, and an increasing vocabulary! Daddy and I pray for you a year full of growth in wisdom and stature and favor with God and man. We pray this year or one soon after will usher in rebirth for you as you profess to know Jesus through repentance and salvation.
*Last two photos taken by Corey Conroy Photography.
Last night Emily created a booklet from her scraps and marker scribbles. As she presented the book to me she asked, “Mommy will you remember me forever?” ” Yes, I will always remember you. Emily, if my mind stops working and I don’t remember you, yes, even then my heart and spirit will forever know you. When we meet again in heaven I will say, ‘There is my Love!'”
A mother’s heart will never forget that which the mind may fail to remember.
Dearest Emily, our firstborn and only daughter, Happy 5th Birthday! You are dearly loved.
Lessons for Every Day
5 Nov
Every day there are lessons to learn, truths we must remember, and His promises that we must cling to.
Our lives have significantly changed adding a third child to the mix. It feels we are in constant motion trouble shooting one situation after another. Ron and I joke that I need to start wearing black and white vertical stripped shirts and have the kids call me “Ref” as I referee most of their waking hours.
The verses from last week’s post need to be printed out and referred to daily in our home. In fact, perhaps I simply need to staple them to my forehead?! I am constantly reminding myself not to complain, to use kind words, to treat others the way that I want to be treated while simultaneously pointing the finger at the children and instructing them to do the same.
The lessons that I want our kids to learn first need to be modeled in their own mom and dad before they can adequately take root. This is true for everyday lessons and in missional, intentional living.
With our step into foster care there have been multiple people who have told me, “I think it is great what you are doing. I wanted to foster, but I couldn’t bare the goodbyes. It would be too hard for me to say goodbye.”
I felt the same way initially. Ron and I were only open to adoption in the beginning. We didn’t think we were “made” to foster. The change in our attitudes came when we realized that there are more children than homes with foster parents. We learned that many of these kids were living in group homes or separated from their brothers and sisters.
We were reminded that all of our children are with us temporarily. The truth is, there are only finite days that God gives us to parent our children before they leave the nest. We decided that we will take the days given us with as many children as we choose to foster over our lifetime; be it one or twenty.
The final kiss goodbye to our sweet Little E is not something that I look forward to with anticipation. I am still relying on today’s grace for today’s race and will leave what remains to God. We continue taking our fears and frustrations to Him as often as we need to in prayer.
My emotions are no different than the next person. I, and all of my family, get attached. We love deeply, we apologize often, we forgive one another and live alongside each other with the love God has given us. This is no less true in foster care.
His love never changes(Hebrews 13:8), the people in our lives in which we can share His love do change.
If you or someone you know has any interest in foster care or adoption I encourage you to take a step in faith. It is a wild and difficult ride…one that our family has only begun. Perhaps hearing from a couple that has adopted multiple times would help? I encourage you to join us at our church to hear guest speaker Tony Dungy and his wife, Lauren, as they share their adoption story. Click here for more details.
You might think that learning everyday lessons every day seems elementary, but mastering everyday lessons isn’t. Keep at it friends…every day.
With love,
Tomorrow’s Race
22 Aug
Each child is a gift from God. No matter how children come to us, they are made in His image and were created to bring Him glory. Ron and I are blessed with two such children. We are seeking to adopt to make it one more.
As we have considered adoption we are now pursuing a license to foster as well. People will caution that you shouldn’t foster to adopt. However, this scenario happens and we are hoping that it does so for us.
Two nights ago Joshua was pushing his over-sized dump-truck outside and went down hard after he raced his truck bobsled style down a small slope in our court. He incurred two pretty nice knee scrapes that kept him awakening multiple times in the night. With little sleep from frequent calls for mom and dad, I came back to bed muttering, “And I want to foster only newborns?” Oh my!
Yesterday on the very few hours of sleep that I did manage to get, I kept asking, “Is foster care really going to work for us?”
The truth is, I really don’t know.
With another night of minimal hours of sleep, I awoke early this morning to some much needed quiet time to read. I need that early morning time alone to be with my Father…and uninterrupted silence is golden. In my study I came upon these verses that spoke directly into my worried heart concerning tomorrow.
But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you. “Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble.
~Matthew 6:33, 34 ESV
Now may the God of peace who brought again from the dead our Lord Jesus, the great shepherd of the sheep, by the blood of the eternal covenant, equip you with everything good that you may do his will, working in us that which is pleasing in his sight, through Jesus Christ, to whom be glory forever and ever. Amen.
~Hebrews 13:20, 21 ESV
If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God, who gives generously to all without reproach, and it will be given him. But let him ask in faith, with no doubting, for the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea that is driven and tossed by the wind. For that person must not suppose that he will receive anything from the Lord; he is a double-minded man, unstable in all his ways.
~James 1:5-8 ESV
God promises grace for today and hope for tomorrow. I cannot rely on today’s grace for tomorrow’s race.
What worries do you need to give God today that require tomorrow’s graces?
6 Miles with DRIVE
20 Aug
This morning as I was running, I reflected on the past six years. Our stint in student ministry started out much like my morning run…will power to keep going even when the cup of joe I had just downed was shouting, “You know it is more comfortable walking!” The longer I ran the easier it got and the less I had to tell myself, “Just keep pushing.”
There were moments in our ministry and moments in my run that looked like the story of the little red caboose; an object bracing the weight of a digressing train and in need of two black steam engines to give a boost from behind to make it over an ominous hill.
In the course of the ministry God sent much needed relationships to get us successfully over mountainous terrains. We are forever grateful for the mountains and for the people that God sent because without both we wouldn’t be the people that we are or are becoming. Likewise the student ministry would not look as it does now either.
Yesterday, it was Ron’s turn to tell our students that he is passing along one baton and taking up another.
He hasn’t stopped running. It is still the same race. It is a different track.
In the midst of the past 6 years some stretches seemed so long. However, in looking back it was truly less than a breath. A compilation of moments each allowed by an infinitely wise and loving heavenly Father.
Ron has continually told me that he wants to be faithful with what God puts in front of him. I can attest during this portion of the race he has done so.
More than anything this mission has hammered into me Galatians 6:9:
Let us not become weary of doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.
This year has been a year of harvest. We have watched the students who are serious about their faith rise up. We have seen them disciple one another in community groups, be faithful counselors and planners in Intersection Weekend (a three day high school led middle school event to transition the 6th grade class into the ministry), and act in such a way as to bring God glory.
It is true of youth leaders as disciple makers as it was of John:
Beloved, I pray that all may go well with you and that you may be in good health, as it goes well with your soul. For I rejoiced greatly when the brothers came and testified to your truth, as indeed you are walking in the truth. I have no greater joy than to hear that my children are walking in the truth.
~3 John 1:2-4 ESV
More than anything as we transition out of student ministry we long to hear that our students are walking in the truth.
Likewise we pray for continued growth.
And it is my prayer that your love may abound more and more, with knowledge and all discernment, so that you may approve what is excellent, and so be pure and blameless for the day of Christ, filled with the fruit of righteousness that comes through Jesus Christ, to the glory and praise of God.
~Philippians 1:9-11 ESV
There is so much more work to do. If it were not so Christ would have already returned. Students, look around you. Pray for one another and hold one another accountable. Read your word and become a student of it. Pray also for Travis and Jessica and the new youth pastor and his family.
I ask you to pray for Ron and I as we set forth in this new area of ministry. As Ron puts on the adult discipleship hat, pray for God’s will to be done in and through us and for faithfulness to obey all His commands. Join us in praying for the health of adult life groups and for God to send out workers into His harvest field both in our local body of the church and to all areas of the world.
May you realize this truth and may we not rob God of the glory due His name:
Lord, you establish peace for us; all that we have accomplished you have done for us.
~ Isaiah 26:12 NIV
Likewise, we agree with Paul in 1 Corinthians 3:
So neither the one who plants nor the one who waters is anything, but only God, who makes things grow. The one who plants and the one who waters have one purpose, and they will each be rewarded according to their own labor. For we are co-workers in God’s service; you are God’s field, God’s building. 1 Corinthians 3:7-9 NIV
It has been our absolute privilege to run the last 6 miles with DRIVE Student Ministries. May God bless the next man who is set to run miles and miles more.
To the volunteers who have worked with us the last 6 years, our deepest gratitude. You have made all the difference! To the students: We LOVE you and count it the greatest blessing that you would have chosen to worship with us.
Because It Is True
1 Jun
“I want you to read the Bible to me because it’s true.”
Nearly two weeks ago Ron and I adjusted our bedtime routines with the children. Before bed we would read a chapter book with Emily and three or four picture books with Joshua prior to reading a Bible account. Our dearest Emily has fallen in love with reading. She will sit for hours listening to us read; that is until we reach for the Bible at bedtime.
Ron decided it was time for a change. Our desire is that the Bible would be the most treasured book for our children. Therefore we reserve chapter books and picture books for nap time and throughout the day, but give the Bible center stage at bedtime.
This Wednesday we were home late from church. It was bath night and we were tired. So what if we skipped one night of reading the Bible before bed? There is always tomorrow right?
Emily did not share our sentiments. She was crying and asking Ron to please read a chapter of Luke to her.
As Ron joined me on the couch I joked, “What kind of parents send their kids to bed begging for them to read the Bible?” He was simultaneously thinking, “What kind of pastor am I to not read the Bible to my kid when she is asking?”
When I tucked her into bed (for the second time that evening) Ron picked up his iPad and said, “I am going in there. I cannot send her to bed when she is asking me to read the Bible to her.”
Through tears Emily says, “I wanted you to read the Bible to me because it’s true. I wanted you to read the Bible because you said you would read it every night.”
What if we were at the mercy of some literate adult to read the word of God to us? Consider how starved for the truth we could be.
Tonight we are attending a high school graduation. I know that in fourteen very short years our Emily will be walking across a stage, receiving her diploma, and completely responsible for choosing to read and follow God’s word on her own. Then two years later, Joshua will follow her lead. After that point we will not know what time they go to bed, where they have been all day, nor exactly what temptations they are facing.
Sowing the seed of God’s word now prepares them for the independence that lies ahead. Because it is true, this home and this time we have is temporary, it is our desire to equip them to live for Jesus all the days of their life. After all, we are planting wheat fields, not beanstalks.
“Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one. You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might. And these words that I command you today shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise. You shall bind them as a sign on your hand, and they shall be as frontlets between your eyes. You shall write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates.
~Deuteronomy 6:4-8
6 Things I Said I Would Never Do As a Parent
25 May
What was it I said we would never do as parents? Oh yes, I seem to remember a few things.
I/we will never…
1. Have kids’ toys in our room.
2. Install DVD players in the car.
3. Allow our children to be unresponsive when people talk to them. I find this difficult to say with a straight face. 🙂
4. Let our children sleep in our bed. (Still only happens when Daddy is out of town.)
5. Bribery. (Didn’t make it two years before I began using this “disciplinary methodology.” I must say I try to use it sparingly.)
6. Homeschooling. I am not sure that I ever said I wouldn’t home school; I do know I thought it.
Let me give it to you straight. Today we are leaving to drive an hour and a half to our state’s home school convention. Our kids will watch DVDs in their portable DVD players that we bought them for their birthdays while playing with toys they probably grabbed out of our room prior to ignoring the neighbors who tell them they look so cute this morning. Then they will ask for the gum that was promised if they dressed without complaining.
Ah, confession is good for the soul. At the very least this may be therapeutic for fellow parents, right?
Be careful what you say you will never do for surely you will one day be given the opportunity to make yourself a liar.
Concerning these 6 Things I Said I Would Never Do As a Parent, I wouldn’t have it any other way my friends… okay, so I would have both my children respond when people talked to them. That is the only thing I would change for the present.
Enjoy your weekend and while you are doing so please read these fabulous, point on posts. They may just be the best ones I have read all year long.
Downward Mobility by Shaun Groves click here
One Thing That Will Make Your Soul Explode by Emily Freeman at Chatting at the Sky click here
Looking Back Over A Decade
18 May
Today we remember our covenant we made 10 years ago. The merging of two lives spiritually and emotionally did not happen overnight, but rather transpired as we stayed the course and trusted God. This life provides the only opportunity to experience a relationship of husband and wife. I too often neglect this truth. In this temporary home, Ron Cooney is my best friend and lover. Over the last 10 years we have grown together and matured.
In celebration, I believe some reflection is in order. Here are 10 lessons that we have learned together the past decade:
1. Faithfulness is a choice we make that blesses our own lives and the lives of all we touch.
Many a man proclaims his own steadfast love, but a faithful man who can find?~Proverbs 20:6
Ron quoted this verse to me just before he said “I love you” for the first time. He desired to be a faithful man. He was so well thought out. I, conversely, had not experienced the unfaithfulness of man to a large degree and quickly, though not entirely thoughtlessly, quipped back, “I love you too.”
Now 10 years later I have experienced the aftermath unfaithfulness leaves. I have seen the destruction that broken covenants inevitably produce and I am all the more aware of the gift that Ron continues to give me.
2. Patience is love waiting.
An inheritance gained hastily in the beginning will not be blessed in the end. ~Proverbs 20:21
Waiting to consummate the marriage on the marriage night and not rushing in the development of our relationship were both aspects that we desired in dating. Ron presented this verse to me, and in true Ron style practiced patience with us, with me, and in the progression of our lives from the start.
3. Purity in singleness prepares us for purity in marriage. Likewise, weaknesses in singleness carryover to our marriage.
To keep the marriage bed pure is not only a task of a single but an ongoing work of the married .With the rings is made a promise, with determination a commitment is kept. A good marriage takes work. Otherwise, we produce a relationship that is hardly working.
4. Perfection is a lie and a snare. “Be holy as I am holy.” Not, “Be perfect as I am perfect.”
You never arrive at the perfect marriage because it is a life-long marathon – not a sprint. We are imperfect people in need of purification by Christ which leads to holiness.
As with everything practice makes… almost perfect. Seek a holy relationship not a perfect one.
5. Differences can enliven or divide.
For example… ideals on money, child raising, and the use of our time and talents. It is hard but necessary to communicate our ideas to one another and arrive at a point of mutual agreement and practice.
6. Think before you speak, but speak before you fall apart.
If you think it and expect it, then project it. No man is a mind reader. We must convey our desires to avoid disappointment and conflict.
7. Marriage succeeds as a triune relationship.
It takes man and wife with God at the head to produce a healthy marriage.
Again, if two lie together, they keep warm, but how can one keep warm alone? And though a man might prevail against one who is alone, two will withstand him—a threefold cord is not quickly broken. ~ Ecclesiastes 4:11-12
8. Keep it fun!
Continue to be playful and flirt with your mate! Try new things and continue to grow together.
9. Keep learning
… about your mate, marriage, and God via prayer, the Bible, and godly counsel.
10. Work as a team… know who to fight against.
For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the cosmic powers over this present darkness, against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly places. ~Ephesians 6:12
10 Reasons Why I Like Being a One-Car Family
6 May
- Added family time– The four of us rarely enjoyed family time in the car prior to becoming a one-car family a year ago following our devastating car accident which you can read about here. Being a (youth) pastor’s wife means Sunday is not family day, but a work day. It took some major adjusting on this mama’s part to remember that getting our children to church was my mission as a helpmate to Ron and his vocation. Now that we are a one-car family I continue to be a pseudo single mom on Sunday and Wednesday, but after church we return to our family of four status as we now enjoy riding home together most Sunday’s.During the week the kids and I enjoy taking Ron to work even though this means everyone is ready for the day a little earlier than we might be if this responsibility was omitted. Together time in the car allows us to confer about scheduling, work out any early morning spats, or just enjoy our coffee and kids together for a few more minutes.
- No payments– We have enjoyed payment free cars for several years prior to our accident and had even entertained the idea of converting to a single car. After totaling my Rendezvous and purchasing the Trailblazer, Ron decided that he would sell his truck to pay the difference for the new purchase and therefore leave us with no payment. This is one of the examples of servant leadership that I so admire about my husband and saw modeled in my dad prior to marriage. Dad drove an old Chevrolet pickup for years so that mom, my sister, and I could ride in a newer reliable mode of transportation.
- Less maintenance– With only one car we have one to maintain including tires, oil-changes, and, as our luck has gone this year, minor fender-benders (one where an ambulance backed into us at a red light and another where a pickup truck busted my back taillight).
- The clean factor– Ron has the car on certain days of the week and I know this means he will more than likely being transporting coworkers at lunch. Therefore, I try my best to have the car clear of trash and most toys. This means we start our days with a clean car.
- Shared bedtime duties– As I mentioned earlier, on church days in the past I would arrive home before Ron and have the added responsibility of lunch or dinner preparation plus bedtime routines for both kids. Now since we arrive home together my work load on those days has been reduced by half. What a blessing!
- Community-With only one car this makes for carpooling with friends on a regular basis for Ron and occasionally for me. Anytime we spend with others develops relationships and furthers the bonds of community. It is both humbling and encouraging to find that so many are willing to extend a helping hand to us. In fact, this week as I visit my family with the kids, a generous friend has loaned his second car to Ron for two weeks. We are so thankful for this act of brotherly love.
- Rising to a challenge-I have to admit contemplating the transition from one car to two and actually doing it are two different things. The reality is that an accident kindly forced our hand. While some have jested, “Why don’t you just buy another car?” We have found that though planning is required the truth is that one car makes life a bit simpler than two. We can actually do without the “more” we believe we require. Thankfully, rising to this challenge has required planning not pains.
- Added margin– Owning one car requires that we simply stay at home more. We find that there are certain days that play dates and outings can occur. This is good for me because otherwise the laundry would be neglected all the more and the toys we have at home would be played with all the less.
- A steady rhythm to our days – I love Jamie Martin of Steady Mom. She wrote the wonderful book Steady Days that speaks of having a rhythm to the schedule of our days. Being a one-car family has definitely enforced a rhythm into the dynamics of our life.
- At least one bicycle is used– Yes, this last point may be pathetic, but it is true. If Ron were not forced to ride his bicycle to work on Sunday’s it most likely would sit next to mine rusting in the sunshine. However, I am going to lean into the curves and bike our county’s trail if it is one of the only things I do in the next two months!
What about you? Do you think you could share the car with your spouse for a day or two? Maybe even a week? If you do, let me know your experience. Perhaps you too would find that the benefits outweigh the inconveniences.
Shotgun!
