Broken and Overflowing

“Mom, I need to go potty.” “Okay, go on and I will come and help you in a minute,” I told our middle son, Joshua. I, as usual, hurried to complete a few tasks and forgot about Joshua being in the bathroom. That is, until I heard the water running.  With Little E close on my heels, I hastily made my way to the bathroom door, only to find that it was locked. “Joshua, don’t lock mommy out of the bathroom honey.”

I reached for the gym clip above the door. Joshy calls it my key.  After a few tries I successfully unlocked the door, unprepared for what lay on the other side…

Picture my two year old, hands splashing in soapy water as it filled the sink to the brim and overflowed onto the floor. Within seconds I turned the water off, pushed the lever so the water would drain, and quickly dried my son’s hands. Then I grabbed my camera as any self-respecting, American mom of the twenty first century; digital documentation of woes is a must!

As I began my verbal correction, the sound of breaking glass in the hallway quickly diverted my attention. I knew instantly what the sound was…the teacup nightlight, a wedding gift we had used for the last ten and a half years of marriage. Little E experiences a gravitational pull towards electrical plugs and outlets; certainly of which included the hallway nightlight.

There we stood, the three of us, with Ron and Emily barely out of our neighborhood to run errands: puddles in the bathroom and glass on the floor.

I cleaned up the glass and instructed Joshua to wipe up the water with the towel I provided. In my mind I pondered how events could take such a quick turn, and how on earth do moms I know with four boys do it?

A few minutes later the boys were splashing in the bathtub, giggling and playing like the two adorable children that they are. I kneeled on the cold tile floor thinking how thankful they should be that they are cute!

God would have me live just like that moment: kneeling, broken and seeking the overflow of His presence. He loves a contrite and humble heart that knows life is more than we can handle independently. God strengthens my weak knees and feeble arms. He wants me to live out of the overflowing measure of the Living Water, Jesus Christ himself, that is available to all who would repent and believe…to all who would ask for His filling in our lives.

I wonder, do you have broken places that you need to confess to the Lord today? Are there areas in your life where an invitation to the Holy Spirit to come and do His work, to fill you with His desires and wisdom, needs to be extended? I certainly have those. God works in our lives according to His will, however, He longs, as most parents, for His children to seek out His help on their own initiative. Run to Daddy today dear friends and let us ask Him to take our broken lives and fill them to overflowing with His presence.

Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God so that at the proper time he may exalt you, casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you. ~1 Peter 5:6-7

 

 

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For When You Don’t Want to Trim the Tree

I lay on my unmade bed, “I don’t really want to decorate this house. I have the nativity up, isn’t that enough?”

Decorations were strewn all over the bedroom and living room and I was strewn on the bed in desperate need of a mental and physical break.

Wasn’t I the woman who had all her Christmas presents purchased before Thanksgiving for a few years in a row? Wasn’t I the one who occasionally decorated for Christmas prior to leaving for Thanksgiving celebrations with family in Alabama? My how things had changed.

Then I recalled Emily’s quip, “The tree looks beautiful mama!” This after I had only plugged the lights in! Then it came to me: I am no longer decorating for myself; I am decorating the house for the kids now.

I lay there a little while longer and let this reality set in. Even decorating the house for Christmas has taken on a selfless twist with the dawning of parenthood. Ashamedly, this was novel news to me. I always thought my mom decorated because she loved Christmas, but maybe it is always for the ones she loves?

After brainstorming what remained of the decorations, I began my quest to decorate the house in such a way that the kids and Ron would happily reflect upon in years to come. The new flannel Christmas sheets hit the mattress, the second nativity the dresser, garland and ornaments for the chandler, and the finishing ornaments on the tree.

Truly, Christmas was never about the presents nor the decorations it’s always been about man’s sinful heart which needed to be redeemed by the sinless Messiah.

The decorations in our home are an outward reminder and a marker to share the story of redemption. The story that all started when the Son forfeited Heaven to lay down in a bed of hay and start our journey Home.

 *A special thanks to the wonderful Neely Farms. We look forward to our traditional after Thanksgiving Day visit every year.

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Moments Bathed in Thanksgiving

I pour the water over his uplifted head. He blinks and shakes the water from his blonde hair.

Only a few weeks ago Little E would have screamed and cried at the mention of pourning water over his hair; forget laying back in the tub to wet it.

Next he surpasses my expectations as he plunges his face into the clear water. I know he must have seen Joshua blowing bubbles in the tub. Joshua is altogether unafraid of plunging face first into depths of water. He knows how to kick and splash his way safely to the edge of the pool in summer time.

Yet, even as Little E is splahing his face in the water like a mallard, I gaze in amasement at this gift from God…an unexpected grace pointing to the fulfilled wholeness of a little life in our care. It is in these graces that the daily work is rewarded. Wasn’t it only days before that I had marveled at the love between foster father and son? Emily was pushing E on the park swing and Ron kissing his puckered lips with every swing forward.

The joy of the Father and Son kiss our upturned faces when they are lifted heavenward in repentance and thanks.

May the Lord pour out His joy on us as we gather together to thank him with upturned gazes for the blessings of another year. May your tables be filled with food, family, and faithful thanks to the Giver of all good and perfect gifts.

May we bathe everyday in moments of thanksgiving.

Happy Thanksgiving!

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Lessons for Every Day

Every day there are lessons to learn, truths we must remember, and His promises that we must cling to.

Our lives have significantly changed adding a third child to the mix. It feels we are in constant motion trouble shooting one situation after another. Ron and I joke that I need to start wearing black and white vertical stripped shirts and have the kids call me “Ref” as I referee most of their waking hours.

The verses from last week’s post need to be printed out and referred to daily in our home. In fact, perhaps I simply need to staple them to my forehead?!  I am constantly reminding myself not to complain, to use kind words, to treat others the way that I want to be treated while simultaneously pointing the finger at the children and instructing them to do the same.

The lessons that I want our kids to learn first need to be modeled in their own mom and dad before they can adequately take root. This is true for everyday lessons and in missional, intentional living.

With our step into foster care there have been multiple people who have told me, “I think it is great what you are doing. I wanted to foster, but I couldn’t bare the goodbyes. It would be too hard for me to say goodbye.”

I felt the same way initially. Ron and I were only open to adoption in the beginning. We didn’t think we were “made” to foster. The change in our attitudes came when we realized that there are more children than homes with foster parents. We learned that many of these kids were living in group homes or separated from their brothers and sisters.

We were reminded that all of our children are with us temporarily. The truth is, there are only finite days that God gives us to parent our children before they leave the nest. We decided that we will take the days given us with as many children as we choose to foster over our lifetime; be it one or twenty.

The final kiss goodbye to our sweet Little E is not something that I look forward to with anticipation. I am still relying on today’s grace for today’s race and will leave what remains to God. We continue taking our fears and frustrations to Him as often as we need to in prayer.

My emotions are no different than the next person. I, and all of my family, get attached. We love deeply, we apologize often, we forgive one another and live alongside each other with the love God has given us. This is no less true in foster care.

His love never changes(Hebrews 13:8), the people in our lives in which we can share His love do change.

If you or someone you know has any interest in foster care or adoption I encourage you to take a step in faith. It is a wild and difficult ride…one that our family has only begun. Perhaps hearing from a couple that has adopted multiple times would help? I encourage you to join us at our church to hear guest speaker Tony Dungy and his wife, Lauren, as they share their adoption story. Click here for more details.

You might think that learning everyday lessons every day seems elementary, but mastering everyday lessons isn’t. Keep at it friends…every day.

With love,

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Costume Parade

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Harvesting Hearts with Principle


Every mom and dad likely agree that parenting is one of the hardest tasks of a lifetime. Tending the soil of little hearts, growing them into Christ-followers with convictions, character, and principles that will weather all seasons of life, takes perseverance and commitment. Even then, it is Christ and the choices of our children that will give the increase.

To do my part, I desire to memorize and convey to my children Biblical truths which teach the principles behind the discipline in our home.

Hebrews 12 teaches that just as an earthly father disciplines his son so too the Heavenly Father disciplines us for our good, “that we may share in His holiness (vs. 10)” Even when our little pumpkins have left the patch, they will not leave the strong, tender hands of their Father.

 

In the book, Help for the Harried Homeschooler, Christine M. Field writes a wonderful chapter on discipline and encourages parents to focus on “principles and relationships, not rules (p. 57).”

 A rule says, “Don’t kill.” The principle is “Love your neighbor.” A rule says, “Don’t be disrespectful.” The principle is, “Honor your father and mother.” ~Help for the Harried Homeschooler, p. 57

 

Here are 10 verses to harvest hearts with principle. Perhaps this will encourage you to write your own list that addresses issues specific to your children. Our children are still preschool age. With that in mind, parents of teenagers might add more verses about honoring God with their bodies and respecting their bodies as temples of the Holy Spirit.

1. “Honor your father and your mother” (this is the first commandment with a promise) “That it may go well with you and that you may live long in the land.” ~Ephesians 6:2-3

2. “Do all things without grumbling or questioning, that you may be blameless and innocent, children of God without blemish in the midst of a crooked and twisted generation, among whom you shine as lights in the world, holding fast to the word of life, so that in the day of Christ I may be proud that I did not run in vain or labor in vain.” ~Philippinas 2:14-16

3. “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the great and first commandment. And the second is like it: You shall love your neighbor as yourself.” ~Matthew 22:37-39

4. The Golden Rule: “So whatever you wish that others would do to you, do also to them, for this is the Law and the Prophets.” ~Matthew 7:12

5. “give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.”~1 Thessalonians 5:18

6. Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness.” James 1:2-3

7. “Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others.” Philippians 2:4

8. “Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord and not for men,” ~Colossians 3:23

9. Persevere “And let us not grow weary of doing good, for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up.”~Galations 6:9

10. Pray “I lift my eyes unto the hills. From where does my help come? My help comes from the Lord, who made heaven and earth.” ~Psalm 121:1-2

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Simple Addition

Most people would think that addition is a simple task of taking objects and grouping them together and determining their sum. However, when talking about adding love and lives a messy process can ensue.

We are so happy to welcome our Little E. He is observing our every move and learning to interact with siblings. His siblings are also learning to interact with him.

This weekend my mom and dad came for a visit and they embraced Little E with open arms and hearts. It is so wonderful to see all of our family embracing him as their newest addition. Both sides of the family have made E feel like he joined us from birth at the hospital. Truly a sweet working of God.

Transitioning from two to three kids has been as difficult as from one to two. Anyone who says that the jump from two to three is easier than one to two is either too far removed from that point in life or had a nanny! Seriously, God is working in some patience and revealing our need for prayerful surrender.

One area that is triple the work is the cleaning of objects and kids. There is never a break! I know this is a point in my character that reaches borderline OCD but everything has a place and everything should be in its place…at least that is what my philosophy is.

With this in mind I know there is selfishness being worked out of me or at least being brought to the surface for repentance and redirection.

Through this first two weeks into foster care, I can truly say that the Body of Christ has reached out to us in tangible ways. Prayer support, texts of encouragement, and gifts to help in caring for E have poured in. We are so thankful for all of the support and know that it is God’s way of saying “I love you” to us.  Thank you to each of you who have prayed and reached out in kindness towards our family.

The greatest hurdle so far has been health. Our E came in a sick little dude and has been on medication the entire duration of his time with us. Last week Joshua was diagnosed with pneumonia (this came out of nowhere) and we have all three kids on breathing treatments. At least 9 times a day a nebulizer machine is running in our home. We may need to pass a clean air act!

Thankfully, Emily’s treatment is more preventative and Ron and I have remained in good health. Both boys appear to be on the upswing. However, any prayers for the runny noses and coughing to cease would be much appreciated.

Addition, therefore, looks simple on paper, but in real life it can be beautifully messy. Addition with the foreknowledge of possible subtraction is even messier…so is the way of foster care.

I am hopeful that our family and His will use this as a means to earnestly seek Him.

 O God, you are my God; earnestly I seek you; my soul thirsts for you; my flesh faints for you, as in a dry and weary land where there is no water. ~Psalm 63:1

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A Merging of Lives

 

 

Yesterday we had the privilege of joining in the celebration of a merging of two lives in marriage.  The union of man and wife is a covenant that reflects that of Christ and His Bride, the Church.

As we watched Tyler and his beautiful bride, Laura, exchange vows, I reflected on our own wedding ceremony. Funny how even the details of our wedding were a foretelling of the personality traits of each of us and the ways in which we would work out this life together. Yet on our wedding day I would propose that in comparison to present-day, I hardly knew myself, let alone the wonderful godly man that I was marrying.

Yesterday, the pastor said that our covenant relationship of marriage is one that we continue to choose to make each day of our lives. It is true; as our love and the years grow, so will our understanding of one another and ourselves, as well as our graces with both.

Today, if everything goes as planned,  our family will travel to be united with our first foster child. As we venture this new path together, merging our lives with that of another child and family, I pray God’s name is glorified and His people edified. This child will have a wonderful temporary daddy in my Ron. Of that there is no doubt. God placed adoption on my heart from a young age and he placed a man in my life that equally embraced the idea from the start.

We will not be walking down an isle as we start this newest journey together, but with each step, and the facing of the unknown, we will do what we have done in marriage and parenthood to date: grow, laugh, cry, fail, fall, be renewed and seek His face and wisdom through the scriptures.

Thank you for joining in the celebration with your prayers! I will see you back next Monday as I am taking the week off to get acclimated.

This home is temporary but the rewards of heaven in His presence are eternal. Press on and in.

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Where to Look for Help



Often when we are in need of emotional or physical help our eyes shift from one problem to another. The Bible tells us that our help comes from the LORD who made heaven and earth.

On Thursday’s, we venture into God’s creation as a family. Gazing at the intricate details of blooms, blossoms, and bugs turns my thoughts towards God’s creative genius. Is it any wonder that genius and Genesis- a word that means beginning– look so similar? God’s creative genius was the genesis that set our world in motion. With his spoken word He created all that our eyes see…and all that they are unable to see.

 

Cardinal Flower

American Beauty Bush

Palmetto

God does not despise a contrite heart for that is the heart that He delights to use. When we are downcast, and in need of help, our gaze should look up for strength, help, and direction from the Maker of all that we see before us.

If, in trying times we focus on that which is our obstacle then our self-pity may get the better of us and defeat will be our mantra. However, if we lift up our eyes to the LORD we see the One who has overcome sin and death on our behalf, and He will faithfully guide us in the path of righteousness and wisdom. We are to lift our eyes up, then walk in His ways.

No work is too great for the God who has created everything from nothing. Let’s lift our eyes today friends.

*The beautiful plant photography is complements of Ron.

 

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